I want to make a feeding game called Fat Kid: The Ice Cream Buffet

I didn’t get a chance to play the vampire stealth action game “DARK” so I’ve been watching video walkthroughs.

It’s like watching a fat kid at an ice cream buffet.

There’s ice cream sandwiches, ice cream cones, soft-serve ice cream, all just walking around, and the fat kid just walks up to it and gobbles it down. The ice cream servings are armed with ice cubes, and just like a fat kid doesn’t like ice cubes getting rubbed on him, the protagonist is slightly inconvenienced when the food fights back. Every so often there is a big ice cream cake with Jello on top, which is a boss fight.

Most people who played the game hated it, but it reminds me of Bloodlines, which should have spawned a mini-genre but didn’t.

People complain that these super-powered vampires don’t have much spookiness, and that they’re just like superheroes. A vampire lady in the game has super-technology computer-power, for example. That doesn’t fit the old-fashioned vampire horror stories even a little bit.

So basically, it’s not a game about vampires, it’s a game about super-heroes who can eat human blood like a small serving of ice cream. There’s always room for ice cream.

By the sixth video it becomes clear that the game’s difficulty curve can be arbitrary and annoying, however.

The protagonist has finally gotten used to his superpowers, and now he’s forbidden from using them. That kind of thing would drive me batty (ha ha vampire bat pun) if I actually had to play the darn game.

They probably would have had better reviews if they had included a greater diversity of enemies and more interesting dialogue. Obviously the game makers were inspired by Bloodlines but everyone who has played that will recall how much more interesting and deep it was! Even Redemption looks well-written, deep, and engaging in comparison.


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